Peter I am thankful that you have posted above. I too went through several years of searching for what was missing in my life after leaving the EB. (Taylor) brethren.
I am pretty sure the critics of brethrenism will not be pleased with what I have to say, but I am posting honestly my experience. I missed the company, the closeness of relationships that I once enjoyed. Our home was always full at least on the weekends and there was happy fellowship. At times there was drinking of course, and that spoiled a lot for me, as we never were great drinkers anyway. But it was the people I missed, the brotherliness of them all, including the sisters of course.
I tried other churches etc, and not one of them met my needs entirely. My wife and I were at each others throats because we had thrown in the towel on brethren, whom we had known and loved.
This went on for quite a time, until one day I met a former brother on the street. He'd also left the Taylor group, and therefore was quite free to talk to me. We went for a cup of tea, and had a good talk, during which he shared his own experiences, which I have to say mirrored my own. We began to wonder how many others there were just like ourselves. Over time we began to discover more people, and after getting together we came to the conclusion that we needed to find somewhere that was close to our previous life, without the extremity of what was going on under Symington and subsequently Hales.
Eventually I made a call to a Renton member in the village where we lived at the time. He came over to see us, and let us know we would be welcome there. We had quite a few things to think about, as we were not sure entirely of their position. But as time wore on, we decided to go to a preaching. We were well received, and decided to return there the following week. We continued coming to the preaching, and sometimes I went to a reading meeting during the week. We gradually began to realize that there was something real there, that was answering our own exercises. There were of course concerns, and our concerns were answered mostly to our satisfaction. One evening before we went to bed, my wife said to me that she had been thinking about breaking bread again, and that our concerns really stemmed from our own pride, as we had been expecting exactly what we had left behind, before JTJr, and there was really no way that this could be the case, irrespective of the company. I said maybe we should check out the Strang Walker group, as there were a few brethren in our village. We did this the next week, and left the meeting with disappointment.
Our course was set, and we asked to have our place at the Supper. We were interviewed by 2 brothers, quite formally. The next week our place was granted, and we once again broke bread with brethren.
We had tried so hard to accept our lot apart from brethren, and I will never forget the morning we broke bread. It felt like we had been on a long journey and had arrived home, to a family. No great fuss was made, which we were grateful for, but we were very warmly welcomed.
Now we have our answer, the void in our lives filled. Our home is once again busy and we have a full social calendar. Yes there are many problem areas with some people in some places, but as I reflect on life, these are not significant. After all, my own concern is really first my wife and my house, then my local brethren. Frankly that's enough to worry about. We do hear some stories of sillyness going on in places, but that is really their own matter. We get on well with all we meet, and we regularly go to fellowship meetings, and visit other places.
It is easy to criticize the brethren. Lord knows I did enough of that myself to last a lifetime. But I have learned to appreciate them, and love them again, despite some idiocy and dubious stories. For myself and my house, we have filled that void and thankfully we were able to pinpoint what it was, and have the nerve to go out and find our place. I'm not bucking up the Rentons, far from it, but we have peace now, and joy in our Christianity and our brethren. Feeling no pain now, only for those who are still struggling to fill that chasm.
Post # 24419 - Posted 3 months ago
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